In the last 52 years, I have spent a lot of time watching TV, films, documentaries and listening to the radio. My sisters used to call me and my twin the Radio and TV Times – we always knew what was on and when and once the TV was on we were glued to it. We would walk backwards out of the sitting room so as not to miss a second of a programme. All of this has influenced my life in many ways. It wasn’t until I wrote the list for this wall that I realised that some of the programmes we watched regularly as a family would have a hard time making it past the censors now. Some are blatantly racist whilst others are so dubiously scripted that they are embarrassing to watch. Then there are programmes / films that are so positive and powerful that they should become permanent fixtures on school curricula. All of the programming – good, bad or indifferent has influenced or inspired me. Over the years, TV has certainly become more diverse but Eastenders still received the most complaints on record simply for airing one ‘all black’ episode.

I created an imaginary weekend guide along with Sean Longmore (designer): the programmes are real.

“Take your heartbreak and make it into art.” Carrie Fisher

In January 2017 I saw Yoko Ono’s ‘One More Story’ exhibition at the Reykjavik Art Museum. My enthusiasm for making something at the ‘fragments’ table was not matched by my partner’s but I was adamant. I needed to create. When I finished I said ‘ I am really good at putting broken things back together again’ and proudly placed the dancing lady I had made out of the china fragments on the shelf. My partner broke up  with me two days later. The break up (compounded with work stress, carer fatigue and the untimely deaths of my aunt and ex-ex boyfriend) contributed to a chronic depression and anxiety crisis that put me in therapy by September. I attended twice weekly for 26 weeks. It isn’t the first time I have had therapy or treatment for depression and I know it won’t be the last. My question is – why don’t we maintain our mental health in the same way as we maintain our physical health, when each is crucial to our existence?

Granted we cannot fully control the events that happen in the world or to us in our lives but we can choose how we react to or treat them. It is important to respond to our early warning signals as soon as things start to go wrong. It is important to know that there are people around you (and professional organisations) who care about you and love you and who can / will help. It is important to know and believe that we – and life – are not Instagram / Facebook perfect but we are all beautiful regardless. It is important to know that there is strength in showing your vulnerability. It is important to know that if life falls apart you can put it back together again and come back stronger. It is important to understand that whatever happens life goes on. There is nothing in life that can’t be fixed. It is important to speak up, to talk about, to show up, to try, to make something out of what you have with whatever limited or unlimited tools to hand. It is essential to find people you trust and it is ok to ask for help. Solving problems together creates stronger bonds and solid networks.

I spoke to B-Traits about dj’ing, music, life, relationships, staying mentally healthy and clocking off.

Stanley Chow is an artist and illustrator from Manchester, England whose iconic work has found worldwide acclaim. He was born in 1974 and raised in Manchester by parents who had emigrated to England from Hong Kong. In an interview with the BBC in 2014 Chow said, “the reason why I am an illustrator is because growing up, the only form of amusement I had was a biro and chip paper. I didn’t really have many toys as a nipper, all I did was draw and draw and draw.”

Everything and everyone has a story. I have been mesmerised by Chow’s illustrations for some years – felt many resonances with the story of his upbringing and my own – loved his work with The White Stripes, relished the irreverence of his New Yorker Donald Trump balloon cover and when I saw the portraits of the Manchester United team in the restaurant at Old Trafford I knew that working with him would be magic. I was elated when he agreed to create the exclusive Paulette Version 3.0 portrait for my Homebird exhibition. Stanley Chow supplied two further pieces depicting memorable places in my story – The Toast Rack (Hollings College) in Fallowfield was a school days landmark on my way to and from the bus stop on Wilmslow Road (my private joke was that he had forgotten to add the poached egg restaurant building – which would complete the catering college set). The Toast Rack nestled along the path behind our house and The Hacienda – well that has its own story …

I’ve never thought of myself as a muse but over the years I have the good fortune to sit for some amazing photographers and artists and have been reproduced and recreated in such a beautiful way that it would be rude not to share it.

The large canvas was painted by a fan in the South of France around 2008 – he delivered it to me in a nightclub during one of my gigs and I transported it home on the TGV and the Metro. The mesmerising Pop Art comes courtesy of Manchester Metropolitan University Alumnus, Helen Sadler who lives and works in Ibiza and the stunning, final image was created by Hannah Tinsley of the Lowry Design Team.

Their work shines out from this wall.

The first time I became aware of graffiti was when my family lived in Fallowfield. There was a petrol station at the end of the road and the brickwork inside the perimeter wall was painted white.  It always attracted huge daddy long-legs, mosquitoes and moths in Autumn. One day there was something written on the wall in black spray paint – it wasn’t graffiti as such since it was written in a very beautiful but foreign script. Someone had made a statement for others to read. I felt intrigued and excluded and tried to copy the handwriting in my exercise book. For years the phrase ‘the writing is on the wall’ has carried an enormous weight for me. Sometimes the scrawls I saw were rough, rudimentary and said rude things about individuals I knew or made angry comments about the system. It sometimes dished up the gossip, thus making secrets that were supposed to be kept private public. It was a long time before I saw something written or sprayed on a wall that was visually stunning in and of itself. This Michael Anthony Barnes-Wynters installation uses this as its basis, taking a list of all the slings and arrows, the slurs and insults, the sticks and stones and compliments we have heard or been subjected to throughout our lives as first generation Black British citizens then presenting them with a colourful yet deceptive, handwritten, typographical beauty.

CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE THAT COULD OFFEND

As soon as I became sexually active I had girlfriends and boyfriends but found that it was not a comfortable, acceptable or easy way to live (or be) for a black girl in Manchester in the 1980s. Even in 2018 my bisexuality still feels like living a part of my life outside of the intersection – never seen as straight enough by the straight community  or gay enough by the gays; always told that I should ‘make a decision’, always viewed with either disbelief or suspicion. Never given that stamp of approval for real existence. When I started working with the LGBTQ+ community firstly with Flesh and A Bit Ginger Productions in 1992 and co-presented the first radio programme for made exclusively for gay youth called ‘Out And Proud’ in 1992 I felt a sense of community and belonging that had been sorely missing. Later Manto’s and Paradise Factory opened the door to a community that was accepting, open, encouraging and understanding. My involvement and activism continued when I moved to London where I was involved with the Zap Club in Brighton, Summer Rites, Gay Pride parties, Queer Nation, Turnmills, Heaven, Discotec, The Cross and fund raising for Terrence Higgins Trust in London. Then in Paris I worked for Solidays, Sidaction, Queen Club and Radio FG (Frequence Gay).  I now work for Gaydio and the Manchester Pride Organisation and continue to support and promote Gay Rights.

I have written poetry, prose and columns / blogs since my Dad bought me and my twin a blue Petite Typewriter for our 8^th or 9^th birthday.  We wrote stories and poems all the time until the ribbon ran out and the keys broke. Fast forward to A’Levels and my teacher, Mr Birch, introduced me to the A-Level curriculum telling our class that ‘prose / fiction is an open hand but poetry is a closed fist’. This stark contrast appealed massively to the storyteller in me. Mr Birch introduced me to the mysteries of the Metaphysicals, to haikus, to Robert Frost, Shakespeare’s sonnets, Chaucer, e e cummings, Stevie Smith, Samuel Beckett and T S Eliot – all of which I still love – and remember. I discovered Emily Dickinson, Sylvia Plath and my feminist sisters at Manchester Metropolitan University when I studied for my degree. I have always seen song lyrics as poems set to music – although many would disagree. For this wall we’ve stitched and sewn some of my poems together into the fabric of the work and songs of professional poets, songwriters / lyricists, rappers. The raw realism of the poem by Faith Hope Mbachu was the end result of a Public Speaking Workshop I ran for NCS: The Challenge in the summer of 2018. This seemingly random selection has a place in my personal story as each arrived at a time of love, romance, crisis, redemption or transformation. Aside from that, I think it makes for a rich, comforting and intriguing quilt.

When I was 7 or 8 my sisters used to call me ‘Nescoré’ because I dressed myself like the stylish French woman (an animated character) in the chicory / coffee advert. Image conscious from the get go, I was always matching, styling, co-ordinating, customising, sewing, bleaching, dyeing, taking in, letting out clothes. When I started to earn money clothes and shoes became an obsession. When I started to dj, model and present ‘Juice’ on TV, my look became important to others and not just to me. Through clothes, make up and accessories DJ Paulette became this larger than life character who was not afraid to take risks or bare a little bit of flesh.

The fashion section bridges the gap between costume and fashion and is all about that transformation. On display under glass are some precious archive items including my mum’s handmade / hand printed 1950’s dirndl skirt, my handmade sequinned knickers, a pair of Jeremy Scott sneakers, a selection of custom made rubber outfits, unusual hats, wigs and clothing created by Manchester, Parisian or Ibizan artisans and designers worn for photo shoots and events all over Europe.

CONCEPT: PAULETTE CONSTABLE | TEXTILE PRINT DESIGNER – CHERYL O MEARA| COSTUME DESIGNER – SILVIA HOYA MENA

INSPIRED BY:

THE KEEPING OF SECRETS & SCAPECOAT pp385-6 WOMEN WHO RUN WITH THE WOLVES by CLARISSA PINKOLA-ESTES

FRIDA KAHLO – Unos Cuantos Piquetitos – a few small nips
GEORGIA O’KEEFE – Ghost Ranch, Flowers of Fire, The Red List

ALEXANDER McQUEEN – SAVAGE BEAUTY

‘A SCAR IS STRONGER THAN SKIN’
1.     A scapecoat is a coat that details in painting, writing, and with all manner of things pinned and stitched to it all the name-calling a woman has endured in her life, all the insults, all the slurs, all the traumas, all the wounds, all the scars. It is her statement of her experience of being scapegoated.

Inspired by the works above, my concept was to create a customised, reversible magpie coat from scratch. The fabric would only exist for this garment since everybody’s story is different. On the dark side of the garment there is a textile print that details the slurs and insults that I have been subjected to (we wear our superficial judgements / criticisms on the daily but become immune to them). On the inside (the side of instinct and knowing) a second, brighter print bears the compliments that act as a barrier to the negativity on the outside. I felt it was symbolic to have magpies (their duality as bad luck omens or good luck totems) on the outside and peacocks (awakening, guidance, protection) on the inside.

The garment makes commentary on my female odyssey through three of the four phases of womanhood from 1966 to 2018. The medium itself – sewing – reflects the political idea of the traditional feminine. It also plays with the idea of transformation by assuming / accepting La Loba (the wolf) in ourselves, finding her home where the spirit of the women and the spirit of the wolf meet.

This Scapecoat is a one-off couture garment made from a unique fabric designed by Cheryl O Meara (Creative Consultant, Print Designer) and created by Silvia Hoya Mena  (luxury sustainable womenswear designer). I personally customised it by overlaying words in metallic, pearlised and glow in the dark fabric paints.

CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE THAT MAY OFFEND

Blood, Sweat and Tears are life’s signature scents. It’s the perfume of anyone who has ever tried, won or lost, worked, grafted, hustled, had a dream, lived a nightmare, succeeded, failed, had hope, lost faith, then picked themselves up and started again. It’s the aroma of longevity and endurance. The essence of life.

The designer, Sean Longmore, made sense of my idea of a ‘celebrity’ perfume line by creating a powerful poster advert with branded bottles. Using one of Soyad Mahat’s photographs and the heavy symbolism of modern advertising made a strong, every person statement.

I spent my childhood gardening, climbing trees, scrumping for apples, finding the best conkers, running wild and playing on the University playing fields behind our house on Birchfields Road. Family holidays were in Blackpool, Saundersfoot, Tenby or Pendine and the Isle of Man. Beaches, canals, fairgrounds, rocks, fields, seas, farms and forests were my playground. As kids we never used a map or a mobile phone and it was bliss to get lost in the great expanse. I like to think that I have retained my spirit of adventure (even though GPS or directions are essential these days). I consider travel a true perk of my job and these are just a handful of the places I have visited.

I love to read. I remember Ms Sands reading the Anansi stories to our class when I was in the infants at St Kentigern’s Primary School. I remember how she enunciated ‘Eeee-paaaa-min-an-dossss you ain’t got the sense you was born with’. I raced through the Ladybird ‘Janet and John’ books so that I could pick my own books from the library shelves. I loved the Chronicles of Narnia, devoured Enid Blyton, dreamt about Charlie And The Chocolate Factory and have always been transfixed by Alice In Wonderland – (so much so that my 40^th birthday was themed around it). The Omen and Amityville Horror scared me so much I had to back them in brown paper and hide them under the bed or in another room. Charlotte Perkins-Gilman’s ‘The Yellow Wallpaper’ arrived when I was in full marital and nervous breakdown – it somehow helped me through. These are a few of my treasured titles.

I was born in North Manchester General Hospital, Crumpsall and raised in Prestwich where I lived until I was three. I then found myself living in Oxford until my mum graduated from Ruskin College. Finally my family settled in Fallowfield where we rooted and grew until we were each old enough to put down our own roots elsewhere. My childhood was spent playing out in parks and fields and libraries and museums and galleries and beaches; taking bus trips, taking photos and eventually taking aeroplane journeys overseas. I knew no fear and I talked to everyone.

The wall dedicated to Blanche Finlay is an homage to my mum, the original Shero – who gained an Economics Degree at Oxford University in 1969, released / self financed her own album ‘Now Tomorrow’ in 1979 and at that time also worked for the City Council as Equal Opportunities Officer for Women. I owe everything to her.

I have been surrounded by seven strong women since I was born – my mum and my six sisters. I have always known there is strength in numbers and my respect and love for women stems as much from my home life and love as my politics. Since I started working in the music industry I have been very lucky to have worked with some of the best, strongest and most talented women in the business. I rely on my female friends and colleagues as an extension of my family circle. This section is a love letter and a thank you that is dedicated directly to them.

The Sheroes track is a collaborative production between myself and producer Chris Massey (Sprechen Records). It was released on Black Riot Records in June 2018 and is our feminist celebration of all the women who have influenced us, who we have had the honour of working with throughout our careers and who are kicking ass and taking names today. It is also a clap back to Daft Punk’s track ‘Teachers’ which in its 48 mentions of people who influenced them omits to mention a single woman.

The collage takes this idea into the art realm layering tear sheet selfies / logos / personal and professionally taken pictures of all the women / friends / colleagues and mentors who I have lived, worked and played alongside together with graphic and typographical depictions of the stars and celebrities I love and am inspired by.

I got my first job in the music industry working as a junior reporter on the Saturday Express show with Becky Want and Chris Evans on Piccadilly Radio 261 MW. I was 18. I now work for Gaydio, Reform Radio and MCR:Live and have had shows and guest spots on Radio 1, Kiss, Capital, Ministry of sound Radio, Radio FG, Nova and Ibiza Sonica.  I have worked in TV for Granada, Channel 4, MTV, BskyB, Carlton and Cherie. I have worked for Mercury Records (as a Publicist), Azuli Records (Promotions & A&R Director), Radio FG (in the bureau as their ‘Consultante Internationale’) and various magazines. I have been a lead singer, a backing singer, a session singer, have written songs and produced tracks. I have even been a copywriter but the job that defines me in terms of length of service is dj’ing. I started dj’ing in 1991 and have never stopped.

The six Spotify playlists chart the music that touched me through the decades. Music is the heart. The pulse. The soul. The blood in my veins. The food in my belly. The roof over my head. The colours I see. The sounds in my mind. The healing force. The natural vibration. The house that Jack built. The rave to the grave. The singing my heart out and dancing till my clothes are wringing wet. The communal connection. The kinetic movement. The endless love. The past. The present. The future.